Exaltation

Interesting way to conclude yet another period of apostolate and work in Kiabakari before setting off for yet another trip, crossing the continents, cultures, time zones, nations, countries...spreading the word about Kiabakari,  this unassuming place in East Africa, which God in His inexplicable decision touched and made His house in which He is praised and exalted as the Father rich in infinite Mercy...


I don't know why He did so. I can only draw comparison with Nazareth and its questionable fame in the then society - 'does anything good come from Nazareth?' It has been the same question throughout the past years I faced time after time. 'Kiabakari? What? Does anything good come from Kiabakari?' Any bad word, any bad fame you could think of, has been already said about Kiabakari. Nobody dared to give a serious thought an idea of establishing a mission here for many years. Surely I would not be the one to do it if not God Himself who challenged me with that minute vision on that odinary Lent Sunday morning in 1991 on my way to Kiabakari from the parish headquarters at that time in Magorombe, Zanaki Parish...

Please, don't ask me why Kiabakari, why me? I have no answers for these questions and never will. I can only say that God wanted to prove that He is the Master of Impossible, that is why He probably chose me, the least suited person to fulfill His will. The more I live here, the more I struggle to move ahead, the more I become convinced that I am the odd piece in this puzzle. Things are happening INSPITE OF me. And that is a fact. Thank God He presses ahead with His plan for Kiabakari INSPITE of me.

Today is my last full day in Kiabakari as tomorrow I will fly (hopefully from Musoma) to Dar es Salaam and further on to Poland on the first leg of my odyssey to the New World and back... How fitting is the fact that today we celebrate the Feast of the Exaltation of the Cross. Most of us know the reason to establish this feast,m so I won't repeat myself. To me this feast has and extra meaning for two reasons.

First, this is the day I crossed the boundary between two worlds - my personal world of a young man, freshly after graduating secondary school, and an unknown world to me of the major seminary in Kraków which was about to form me into someone else, ready to receive priesthood after six years of intense formation. On that day, September 14, 1982, together with some 94 other young men, I reported to the major seminary gate to start my six years long formation...

Secondly, the late bishop Justin Samba upon his return from his personal pilgrimage to the Holy Land in 1999 on the occasion of his 25th jubilee of priesthood, brought a special gift to the shrine in Kiabakari - the authentic, certified relics of the Holy Cross. Since then I have been the custodian of the Holy Cross in the diocese of Musoma. Sometimes, only sometimes, I use the small monstrance with the relics of the Holy Cross during the Liturgy of the Good Friday. Then we kiss and adore the true Cross of Christ. What a powerful experience this is!

Having these reasons in mind, I celebrated the morning Mass in an unique spiritual ambiance, offering up to Christ everything I was able to do in those past years, no matter how little that might be, along with the stream of frustrations, disappointments, trials, crosses, betrayals and all the good things to the contrary... Closing this way yet another chapter of my life in Kiabakari and getting ready to turn the page and get ready to fill it with new challenges and hopes.

Tomorrow, on the feast of Our Lady of Sorrows, I will start my journey. I don't know what will be the outcome of it. I just leave it up to the LOrd with full confidence that He will take of everything. This is what says my favorite Psalm 37:4-5: "Find your delight in the LORD who will give you your heart's desire. Commit your way to the LORD; trust that God will act."


On my desk in private office since long I put the card with words taken from Thomas Merton's prayer I find echoing my own sentiments and understanding or lack of of the secret of my life. With the words of this particular prayer I will go forth and do whatever I can to help the Lord to fulfill His plan for Kiabakari.

My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going.
I do not see the road ahead of me.
I cannot know for certain where it will end.
Nor do I really know myself,
and the fact that I think I am following Your Will
does not mean that I am actually doing so.

But I believe that the desire to please You does in fact please You.
And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing.
I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire.

And I know that if I do this You will lead me by the right road,
though I may know nothing about it.

Therefore I will trust You always though I may seem to be lost
and in the shadow of death. I will not fear,
for You are ever with me,
and You will never leave me to face my perils alone.