Pure Simplicity

So many people around here claim that they cannot reach the decision to sanctify their spousal love and relationship by the sacrament of marriage because of lack of resources to prepare a wedding party. They used to dismiss my inquiries into the possibility of this sacramental step in their Christian lives by saying that they still 'gather the strength' (bado tunakusanya nguvu). But this strength seems not to materialize any soon or never...

There is a saying in Swahili - 'magari yanapangana. mwaka kesho wanaachana' (the cars form a motorcade, next year they will break up), meaning that lavish weddings end up very often in break ups in short future (as we can witness on not occasion around here)...

This morning I blessed a marriage of a couple who came on bicycles with their witnesses from Nyamikoma village some 6 kilometers away. They were together for many years and have children. They had just recently a funeral of one of their close relatives and decided not to throw any wedding parties, but instead - just to come to church to bless their marriage and go back home just like that...

We were only a few people in the church during the liturgy of the sacrament of their marriage. And I loved that fiercely! They were so determined to fix their status with the sacrament after so many years of life far from the Eucharist, that they were not even bothered to think about glamorous outfits or cars or anything. They reconciled themselves with God in sacrament of penance first, then we proceeded with the liturgy of the sacrament of marriage.

After the ceremony, we went back to the office to register the marriage in parochial books, then I issued them with the government certificate of marriage which they and their witnesses signed duly, then we shook hands and promised to see each other when I come back from Poland, as they wanted to thank me personally by inviting to their home and gifting me with something that shows their gratitude...

I love this pure simplicity of the form of the sacrament of marriage without empty show of wealth, extra glamour and huge expenditure.

Years back, in 1992 or 1993, if I remember correctly, I blessed a similar marriage of a couple who came withe their witnesses on two bicycles from Kyawazaru, some 10 kilometers from Kiabakari. We had a simple ceremony in the church, they went back home with their witnesses on their bicycles, and had a wedding lunch consisting of ugali wa mtama (stiff porridge made of millet) and a duck cooked in gravy. They are still together, going strong, living in Mwanza...

Luckily, there are more examples like these two in my mission. Still, so many dream in daylight of glamorous wedddings, full of guests, huge spending, cars, banquets... and they live this dream years in years out, never to materialize... Some die without marriage in Church, some do it, resigned when they are old...

I love and advocate for the pure simplicity of the sacrament of marriage. Just two of them, bride and groom, their witnesses, parents and close relatives and friends, with simple ceremony and simple wedding party, reflecting the simple lifestyle of the people in question...

But will this call fall on dead ears of those who prefer to dream on.... or will it bring some sense into lives of people who need to complete their love with the love of Christ amidst them and finally they arrive to the correct decision?