Learning To Fly

Same airport, same city. So many times, so many times deja vu, so many times. And always at the starting point, and always learning to fly, literally and metaphorically... Learning to fly, conquering again and again and again fear of the well known unknown... I feel sad this morning, I feel tense and apprehensive, knowing where I am heading, heading back to where I belong (really?) to continue what is elevating me and killing at the same time... I have no words to explain, I don't even try... just listening to the long forgotten music I once was so fond of which came back suddenly at this particular point of time.... yes, learning to fly. Will I ever succeed? Or is it simply a momentary lapse of reason?