Clear Air

It is easier to breathe when you are able to clear the air between you and your lost friend... Today, my personal satisfaction flowing out of the feelings of relief and accomplishment after finishing the work on English version of DVD documentary on Kiabakari and on other DVD project (The Cemetery of World War II Polish Refugees in Tengeru, near Arusha, Tanzania) I was asked for by my friends in Canada (some of them were refugees themselves during the war and right after it, then they found a new home in Canada and elsewhere), has been further boosted by feelings of inner joy after clearing the air between me and a once a very good friend of mine who went AWOL, leaving bad taste in my mouth on the way out, but today I feel like I got him back after waiting for so long.
Truly, patience pays sometimes handsome dividends... I was just waiting and praying for him to come to his senses and yes, he eventually came back and we were able to shake hands and start afresh a new relationship. I am very happy! I wish I would do the same with a few other people for whom I am still waiting patiently to come back... I do not lose hope and I do pray a lot daily that one day I will be able to rebuild our good rapport and friendships. We deserve this, honestly. Sometimes someone says too much without thinking reasonably or making decisions on basis of momentary emotions and then it is so hard for that person to admit it and to ask for pardon and a chance to build a new world on ashes of past failures...

I do not shut the door to the corridor of reconciliation and peace between me and other people. Sometimes I must keep quiet to let other person to go through the healing process and come back with a very important word which is a key to the newly restored relationship. A simple word and so hard sometimes to say. 'I'm sorry!'...

The Gospel teaches me to forgive an offender instantly in my heart, to not let the poison out of my system immediately, but to restrain with an external act of forgiveness till the time when that person arrives to the point of understanding and admitting his or her fault and then doing a right move of coming back to me and admitting the fault asking for forgiveness. Then, following a Merciful Father's example in Jesus' parable, what is left is to embrace with love the prodigal son or daughter or a friend, and restore his or her dignity by forgiving and forgetting...

I wish and pray that those few lost friends come back to me and we may clear the air between us and move on with our friendship and close ties... For some I've been waiting for many years, for others it's been relatively short period of time...

I am not an angel myself and it pains me a lot when I make a mistake, when I offend someone or I do something wrong, then I acknowledge my failure and mistake and want to amend what was wrong. But then I never get a chance as the person in question bluntly refuses to accept my apology and to rebuilt broken bridges... Although I know that in such a situation I am cleared of offence in God's eyes and forgiven, even if the person I hurt with my words or deeds refuses to forgive me, still the pain remains and disappointment that things could have been so much better if we were grown ups and let the mercy and love rule supreme between us.